Well, its a Monday. And of course, because I am a typical human being that complains about the most pointless things, I woke up grumpy and didn’t want to start the day. I went to school, got annoyed by everything and everyone, rolled my eyes at least 10 times in the span of an hour, and then finally decided it would be better for everyone if I just went and sat alone in a nearby Starbucks to do some soul searching and spend some quality time with Jesus. As I sat in the typical hard wooden Starbucks chair and waited for inspiration to strike, I looked out the window at the white sheets of snow that came down, and sure enough, it did.
As I looked up into the abyss above me, I suddenly felt so small. It was as if I physically felt my entire perspective shift. I watched as each snowflake eventually reached its final destination–landing on the sidewalk, the street, passing cars, getting tangled in the hair of downcast heads, wetting peoples eyelashes, leaving little droplets of water on their clothes. I watched as the snowflakes suddenly melted into nothingness in just a matter of seconds. They disappeared as quickly as they came. But one cannot acknowledge the destination without first acknowledging the journey. Those little snowflakes, so gentle, sweet and pure, didn’t have it easy coming down. It was as if they were in a race against the clock, trying to reach their destination with dignity as they plummeted to the bottom, with not much time to spare. I stared straight up into the sky from whence they came. It was as if I stared up into a cloud of glorified dust. As they came closer, they grew in size, but when they began, they were barely there, barely visible. Little grey specks. I watched as they were thrown by the wind, thrashed every which way, flipped upside down again and again. I watched as little pieces of them got lost and flew away, I watched as some turned into nothing and never made it to the ground. I watched as others kept coming, never giving up, falling with determination to their destination.
Now, you are probably wondering why I am creating such a romanticized fairy tale about something as insignificant as snowflakes, but bear with me.
This week I have been contemplating something.
I have been mulling over the idea that we are all dust. It sounds strange, I know. But if you think about it, and I mean really think about it, we truly are dust. We are so fragile, so easy to sway. We are everywhere, yet we can disappear with just a breath.
When I sit back and look at the world that I live in, I always end up in a deeply melancholy state without fail. I can’t help it. I look around at all the sadness, all the pain, all the brokenness, all the poverty, all the bullying, all the hate, and my heart breaks a little. But those aren’t the things that bring my heart down the lowest.
It is when I look at all the beautiful people around me and I see them wasting their lives that my heart reaches an all time low, and it takes quite some time spent in His Word and in quiet prayer to get me out of it.The trouble is, we think we have time.
We go about every day thinking “It’s okay, I have tomorrow”. We wait for every tomorrow to come with such passion, that we forget that today exists for the same purpose that tomorrow does: to live.
We wait for tomorrow, next week, next summer, next year, next weekend. We are stuck in a constant anticipation for things that we cannot see. There is no guarantee that tomorrow even exists. Yet we wait, and we put our lives in the “tomorrow” box and then once tomorrow comes, we do it all over again.
Funny isn’t it? That we have such faith in tomorrow, something we cannot see, touch or feel, yet one of the most universal reasons for not believing in God is because we “can’t see Him, touch Him or feel Him”. I tell you, people are capable of a great faith… But too often we invest our faith in feel-good fantasies, rather than the beautiful reality that Jesus came to earth to give us. There is absolute proof of God. There is no proof of tomorrow.
Our world has known a monumental amount of pain. We have seen wars, massacres, school shootings, needless tragedies. We have watched people die at the hands of other people, we have seen life begin and end just as quickly, we have known suffering in its purest form. Our hearts have been broken countless times. Yet we never learn our lesson and we still live with our thumb securely fastened on the pause button, pinching our eyes shut, closing out the world in hopes that when we wake up, it won’t be such a dark, sad place filled with precious lives that end too quickly. We sit beneath the giant clock of time, trying desperately to block out the deafening ticktock that began the second we took our first breath, and which will continue long after we are gone. Time never stops.
So what are we doing with it? Are we sitting quietly as it runs away? Are we waiting for it to slow down? Why don’t we give time a run for its money?
Why don’t we dig deep into life and figure out what we believe and then believe in it passionately? Why don’t we love with an intensity that drowns out all the hate? Why don’t we embrace every part of life? The hurt, the love, the sadness, the joy, the loss, the opportunity, until there is nothing left? Because, the way I see it, I serve a very intentional God and there is a reason for every season that He brings into my life. Nothing is stagnant and void of reason. Everything under the sun holds meaning.
So why don’t we stop waiting for tomorrow and live in each today that we are given?
I’m not saying to go out and make every possible mistake, or go cover yourself in tattoos, or jump off a cliff with a faulty parachute. I’m just saying, we need to quit being stagnant in our passion and our love and we need to make the most out of the time that we are given.
At the end of my life, I want to know that I loved every single person I knew with a love that left a mark on their lives. I want to know that I lived every moment that I could, instead of waiting for the next one to come. I want to be able to look back on my life and smile, knowing that I ran with life, rather than closing my eyes and waiting for the ticking to stop.
I want to look back and see that Jesus was present in every second, and that I knew it, and I loved it, and it showed.
I guess my point is this: life is precious. We are all dust.
Like the little snowflakes, we start out tiny, small, barely visible. But we grow as we get closer to the end. On our way to our destination, we get thrashed around, beaten up, whacked every which way, and maybe a few pieces of us get lost along the way, but if we do it right, we eventually get there. We make it. The thing about those falling snowflakes that makes us different, though, is the fact that they knew their time was limited and decided to make the most of it… We, however, forget all too often that our time for living is fleeting.
Lets live with intentionality and stop living in the fantasy of tomorrow.
We are all falling dangerously fast to our destination. It is what we do with our time on the way there that matters.