Each week, I like to try and sum up what I learned in a sentence or two. This week I learned: “Have you gone from blue skies to disaster in a matter of moments? Take heart. Jesus is in the boat.” I am so blessed to have a dad and a pastor (all in one) who so bravely preaches the word of God every week.
Often the most disastrous times of our lives are the ones that we don’t see coming. Often it is on the sunniest days, when we wake up with stars in our eyes and dreams in our hearts, that our world has a way of flipping upside down before we even have time to take a breath before we go under.
From personal experience in my own life, it has been the storms that I never saw coming that have nearly killed me. I was completely surprised. There I was, completely unassuming, loitering about, trying and failing to plan the steps to my own life, and thats when they hit. I can look back on them now and see the finger prints of Jesus. I can now see how He was guiding me through the pain, healing my deepest hurts, mightily orchestrating every word, every moment, every breath in order that I might see more of Him and understand the depths of His heart a little better. Notice how I said I can see that NOW.
In the midst of these storms, I never lost sight of who God was, but so often I lost sight of the fact that it was that same God who I loved that was bringing me through these storms. I often questioned Him, begging Him to tell me why these things had to happen. All I needed was a little hint, a little whisper as to why things were turning out like this. I just needed a little help, a few solid reasons as to why I should trust Him through such pain. Sadly… foolish, little Clare didn’t take the time out of her nagging “why” prayers to turn to the Word of God and recognize that all the reasons sat quietly inside, waiting for her.
In the midst of storms, when the end is not in sight, and the pain is so real, its so incredibly easy to lose sight of His goodness… As sad as it is to admit that. Its a natural human reaction when we are being pressed on all sides, when it feels as if our very breath is being taken from us.
But where is our faith? I can’t promise that I will pass with flying colors the next time I go through a storm. I can’t promise that at all. But I hope that through all these years of unfailingly being shown His grace and sovereignty that I have learned that He is completely trustable. I hope that the next time this journey of life feels impossible, that I don’t lose sight of His goodness like I have so many times before. I pray that I won’t ask “why” so much, but rather I will pray “Your will be done”.
Every person has been through a storm. Whether it was life altering, or it sat quietly beneath the surface. I’m sure every person has felt moments much like mine, in some way, shape or form. Moments of wanting to understand, rather than trust.
Even if another persons life looks completely comfortable on the outside, that person has still experienced pain in some way–its just different than how you have experienced it. I struggle with this all too often, I will admit. Sometimes it is hard for me to fight against that inner voice that tells me that I have it really hard. When the truth is, I do have it hard, but I also have Jesus… And because of that, I will always have the best life I could ever ask for.
But if there is one universal truth that I have learned during my short time here on earth, it is that each person knows what it means to hurt. One just cannot live life without experiencing some form of pain. That would be like trying to live without breathing.
My prayer is that we would focus more on the love of our Savior, rather than the pain of this earth. I pray that we would take Him with us, not leave Him behind (or attempt to–one does not simply get rid of Jesus).
These storms are meant to bring us closer to Him. The Lover of our souls. The Healer of our pain. The Maker of the skies. Why wouldn’t we want to be closer to Him?
“22 One day he got into a boat with his disciples, and he said to them, “Let us go across to the other side of the lake.” So they set out, 23 and as they sailed he fell asleep. And a windstorm came down on the lake, and they were filling with water and were in danger. 24 And they went and woke him, saying, “Master, Master, we are perishing!” And he awoke and rebuked the wind and the raging waves, and they ceased, and there was a calm. 25 He said to them, “Where is your faith?” And they were afraid, and they marveled, saying to one another, “Who then is this, that he commands even winds and water, and they obey him?”